school jokes

,

H is not always silent

⋅

When I was in school, I used to ask a lot of questions….!!

One Day I asked Ms. Doris, our English teacher:”
Why do we ignore some letters in pronunciation? eg. The letter….’H’…….in Hour, Honest, Honor….. e.t.c………???”

Ms. Doris: “We are not ignoring them; they are considered silent.” …!!
(I was even more confused……..??)

During the lunch break, MS. Doris gave me her packed lunch & asked me to heat it in the cafeteria.

I ate all the food and returned her an empty container….!!

Ms. Doris:—- “What happened, I told you to go and HEAT my food & you are returning me an empty container??”

Me: — “Madam, I thought ‘H’ was silent”

Liked Liked

, ,

Positive letter from mathematics teacher to parents

⋅

New generation  requires positivism…

Dear Parent,

Your child’s distaste for mundane subjects such as mathematics shows an imaginative mind. Why, he wonders, does the square of the hypotenuse have to be equal to the square of the other two sides in a right-angled triangle? It is no wonder that he has scored a splendid zero in his math exam. Unfortunately, even brilliant students have to pass exams. Could you gently break that news to him?

Yours entreatingly,

Teacher

Liked Liked

,

Tiger is online

⋅

The teacher asking general knowledge questions to students.

 

Teacher : Students.. On “Britannia Tiger” biscuit cover, there is a green dot. What does that mean?

Student: Tiger is online

Liked Liked

,

Relation between Liquor and donkey

⋅

Relation between Liquor and donkey

One bucket of water & one bucket of liquor is placed in front of a donkey.

Donkey drinks water & leaves the place.

The Teacher then questions students ” What do you learn”?

Students answer – One who does not drink liquor, is a donkey.?

Liked Liked

,

Moral of the story

⋅

Moral of the story

The Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories.

There were all the regular types of stuff. But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. “Janie, do you have a story to share ?’

”Yes madam……My daddy told me a story about my Mom. She was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit.

She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.

She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.

.

Pin drop silence in the class !!

.

”Good Heavens,’ said the horrified teacher. ‘What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?

“Stay away from Mommy when she’s drunk……!!!!” ?

Liked Liked

,

Economics is not difficult if we have right examples

⋅

Economics is not that difficult if we have the right examples.

Interviewer: What is Recession?

Candidate: When “Wine & Women” get replaced by “Water & Wife”,

that critical phase of life is called Recession!!?

*******************************

Accountancy fact:

What is the difference between Liability & Asset?

A drunk friend is a Liability

But

A drunk Girlfriend is an Asset.

?????

Liked Liked

Load More