drink jokes

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Lecture on Alcohol abuse

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A Drunk man is stopped by the Police around 1 AM & is asked where he is going at this time of night.

The man replies, “I am going to attend a lecture on alcohol abuse & ill effects on my health.”

Officer: Really….??? Sounds interesting… Who is giving that lecture at this time of night???

Man replies, “My wife!!!”?

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Advising a drunkard is not easy

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Dialogue between a Priest and a drunkard:-

Priest – Don’t drink this much liquor. You will go to hell.

Drunkard – What about he who sells the liquor?

Priest – He will also go to hell.

Drunkard – What about he who sells snacks before Liquor Shop?

Priest – He will also go to hell.

..

Drunkard – Then I have no problem in going to hell….

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A great offer to choose

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WIFE TO “DRUNK” HUSBAND: from now on, if your lips touch liquor you will never touch my lips

HUSBAND: awwwwww??

WIFE: now what are you thinking ??

HUSBAND: deciding……

WIFE: deciding what ??

–
*18 yrs old SCOTCH*

OR

*45 yrs old LIPS…?*

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An interesting baptism

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An interesting baptism

James was baptized. The pastor dipped his head into water 3 times and said: “you are now baptized. Your sins are forgiven, you are a new creation in Christ, your name is now Jacob. No more drinking of alcohol”.

Jacob went home and goes to his refrigerator, took all his alcohol bottles out, dipped them into water 3 times and said: “you’re baptized, your sins are forgiven, you’re a new creation in Christ, your name is now Fruit Juice”.

Don’t laugh alone ?

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